i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
