When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
why does every cop we meet know your name?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize