Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
