so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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