By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
