You made me cry and you don't even care
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
love makes seman taste better
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
