The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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