I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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