Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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