Can i not drive my cunt home
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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