if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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