piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I will die if light touches me.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize