I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
