drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
