I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
