Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Randomize
