Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
