we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
lets start a swedish sibling band together
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Randomize
