check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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