Sponge bath it is.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
