Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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