Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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