It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
