the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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