I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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