I bet he comes in French.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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