what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
