Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
