Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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