She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
