I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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