How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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