I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I currently don't understand fingers.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
