if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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