a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Randomize
