it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
