maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
