i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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