chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
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