I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Randomize