I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
