it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Randomize
