We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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