Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Boobs are out for the taking
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
