Can Purell be used as lube?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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