Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
