Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
