K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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