You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
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