So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Couch. On fire.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
