She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
